Ep28: How To Be In Harmony When Success Doesn’t Seem to Last

ASM Ep 28: How To Be In Harmony When Success Doesn’t Seem to Last

[00:00:00] Hello. Thank you so much for being here. .
I, am so grateful to all of the well wishes, all of you who sent me messages and comments and DMS and phone calls, just, checking in on me. How are you doing? I’m thinking about you. I truly, truly felt, lots of love and just uplifted by all of you who reached out, it felt really, really genuine. And I just want to let, you know, that I truly, truly appreciate you guys.
I am going to be hosting a,a roundtable, a discussion and I’m saying this as a discussion because it it’s going to be interactive where you can come on and we can discuss for those of you who are dealing with uterine fibroids and or deciding if you’re going to have surgery, if you’re going to have a hysterectomy [00:01:00] or not, I am here as an open book.
I want to share as much as possible with anyone who is interested in this knowledge and this information, because what I learned is that. There’s a lot of information that’s not out there.
There’s a lot of this conversation that’s not really happening, and I just want to be able to offer whatever information support. that I can, and possibly also bring in some additional people who have had maybe, the different types of hysterectomies or different types of procedures to remedy their uterine fibroid situation.
So if you’re interested in that, I have a wait list that is available for that. Meaning you can sign up to get the details for the time and date and you can join and show up, ask questions.
So that’s a little extra. Lots of rebirth.
But today, right now, I’m going to talk about when success doesn’t seem to last or when your success doesn’t seem to last.
[00:02:00] And this topic was kind of sparked yesterday. There was a solar eclipse, at the time of recording this, April 9th, there was a solar eclipse. On April 8th, and I spent that time with a friend and neighbor of mine, and we were talking about all kinds of things like, you know, revert, what we’re learning in this lifetime individually.
And that sort of led us into this conversation about, like, the challenges, when it comes to your personal development, your personal growth, your spiritual growth, spiritual development, all of those things, however you want to define that, we were talking about how whenever you are working towards something, you know, whether it’s an internal goal, an external goal, things like that, we are obviously we’re doing it and we want to succeed at that thing. Right. So we want the success. We want, we want to reach that place, that feeling where it’s like, okay, I have achieved a thing. So we’re talking about success there you know, we get so hard on ourselves and maybe you are dealing with this [00:03:00] if you are a person who tends to be very hard on yourself when you are not in a moment or in a place of success or a place of feeling successful, right?
Or being seen as successful, how do you bring harmony to those moments when your success doesn’t seem to be lasting? This morning, I’m doing sort of like my morning routine.
I’m reading, you know, I do my meditation. I do some reading, you may not know, but I was raised in a household, where we had Christianity and we had, Islam in terms of religious.
Foundations in our household, but. Before I would say, even outside of that, I just personally really enjoy studying psychology, philosophy, religion, astrology. I love all of those kinds of things that sort of like, just give us perspective.
And so I was reading the Quran this morning and I love that this year particular and always really enjoy [00:04:00] when, there are years where certain, holidays traditions correspond together. So, like, this year, in the Islamic faith, you have Ramadan and it was happening at the same time, as Easter in Christianity. And it’s just so for me anyway, I enjoy when that happens and seeing like the different, ways, the same concept or the same topic is spoke about in different texts, different religious books or different conversations amongst people, not because it’s different, but because of how much alike it is and you can see where, okay, these two things, or these three things, or these five things are all Saying things, but they’re saying them in slightly different ways. I just think that’s really cool. I think that, God’s spirit has a wonderful way of making that happen.
And so today, having had that conversation yesterday, I’m reading this morning and it talked about how success [00:05:00] or failure in this world comes to everyone at varying times.
And I was like, so on point. with, what we were talking about yesterday, where it’s like, not only are you reaching to be successful in a certain area or many areas of your life, it’s not just enough to have that success, but there’s a lot of conversation.
Maybe for you, you might be feeling external , or internal pressure from the external pressure to not just Have a moment of success, but to stay in like perpetual success, and that’s just not possible. So if you take nothing else from everything else, I might say here when it comes to when your success doesn’t seem to last.
It’s because it doesn’t and, and that’s okay. That’s not a problem that, that success doesn’t last. That success is not constant. That success is not consistent. And I think, that kind of creates the stress, the anxiety, the overwhelm that a lot of [00:06:00] people experience, that my clients come to me with and that we are working through is because the idea that or the image that has been given, is that you reach success so that you can stay successful, right?
And so everything is about how do you get there? And how do you stay there? And that creates a lot of pressure because nothing is Constant 100 percent all the time. Everything has seasons. It has ebbs and flows. There are mountains and valleys and all of these things coexist and have a purpose.
It is purposefully that way. You could not ever, you would not even know to strive for success. in whatever area of your life or season that you’re in your life, you would not even know that you want to strive for success if you’ve not ever experienced failure or have a longing for something more.
So you want be successful all the time because you have to come back to some sort of other realm, you have to come back to like a baseline.
there’s success. And [00:07:00] then there’s gratitude for where you are right now, there will be failure, right?
Because failure. which failure is not even a problem, But I know the word failure for a lot of people. It’s like, well, then I didn’t do what I was supposed to do. I didn’t meet, but failure is just you learning what you now need to do differently gather help, gather more resources, whatever, so that now you can strive towards the success once again.
And knowing that when you reach a certain level or when you reach success in a thing, you will be there and that’s cool. And you can celebrate that and we can enjoy that for what it is, which is why we have to live in the present moment, then have to learn how to be present and enjoy when we hit that mountain top, that peak so we can really enjoy that success, because it’s not going to be long lasting in the sense that it’s not going to last forever. That’s just not the rhythm of this life.
And [00:08:00] when we’re not there, knowing that we will be able to get there again at some other point, because, It is like a revolving door.
You’re successful, you’re striving towards success or you’re failing, AKA learning how to become successful again. Right? So it’s always these things and it’s happening over and over again. There’s not just this one like, Oh, success. And now how can I stay there all the time that is, in my opinion, that has been the experience of a lot of people that I work with myself included, where the overwhelming anxiety comes from because I want to hit success and I don’t ever want success to diminish or move because now that says something that’s wrong. That’s a problem.
When your success doesn’t seem to last, it’s because that’s the nature of it. You will not be successful all the time. And in addition to that, success comes to each of us [00:09:00] at varying times. Right? So, if you’ve not ever heard this, there’s a quote that’s like, comparison is the thief of joy.
Typically, when we compare, we’re comparing our perception of their success, in comparison to ours. Right? But It’s in these good books, these good ancient texts that success is in. and this comes to all of us at varying times.
And even as a coach, I can give you guidance and I can also be a sounding board, a mirror, you know, all of these different things with folks at the end of the day, and I say this to my clients all the time, we only get to co create.
I’m sorry like, I have some bones to pick when it comes to the coaching, teaching, empowerment, inspirational, industries, when folks say, well, all you got to do is just do what I did and this is how you get there.
It’s not that black and [00:10:00] white because each of us have our own path, our own design, our own timeline. And as much as we, are responsible for and get to make choices and move towards those things, we only get to co create so that, that’s And again, these are my beliefs. If you think that you were created and everything is all about what you do all the time, good for you work that work, that process, that framework.
But, I believe I’m created by a God who has a plan way bigger, than what I’m always privy to. And so even when we are doing the same things as someone else. That has gotten them success It’s not a scam.
They literally, this is what they did. They gained success. We can try to duplicate that process and we may not be successful in the same amount of time or in the same way as them. [00:11:00] And that is because these good books, these good texts, Say that we’re going to get to be successful, but at varying times, right?
I also like to think about this too. Like when it comes to, to couples and relationships.
You know, hopefully when you are successful, in your endeavors or when you are successful or healthy, right? in your physical body, the physical realm. Hopefully, if there’s going to be a time when your counterpart, your spouse, your mate, is having, maybe a downturn in their health, maybe a downturn in their, endeavors, maybe a downturn, or just they’re coming back to a baseline in terms of their, success or accomplishments, hopefully that’s happening when you are on the upside.
Sometimes I think, especially when it comes to like personal, like intimate relationships it’s like, well, I’m at this level of success and I [00:12:00] wanna a mate who’s also at this level of success and we’re gonna be this level of success all the time, and we gotta always be here.
But what if y’all both fall at the same time, who is holding the other person up?
When you look at it this way, it’s a good thing that we are successful as individuals, at varying times. That way, when you’re down, hopefully the people you have in your circle, hopefully your spouse, hopefully your community, when you’re down, they’re up. Right. And these people are, happy to, lift you because they’re up, even when you’re down and vice versa.
If everybody’s trying to be up all the time, who’s y’all feeling me? Like, who’s, who is backup? Right. And as people, as humans, we all need backup at different times of our life. So when it feels like, your success doesn’t last, it’s okay. I just want you to, know that it’s [00:13:00] okay. And just know that that’s a natural order. it doesn’t mean that you need to be doing more.
You gotta be working harder. Cause again, we just get to co create in this experience of life. And so. Trying to fight against, Hey, this is just not your time right now , this is your time to kind of fall back a little bit, embracing that versus trying to power through and push through, I think will, will, feel better and will allow you to regather your strength, your knowledge, your, your resources, whatever, so that then you can be on the uptick striving towards success again.
in a way where you are not depleted, where you can find harmony in failure, You can experience harmony, between success and failure. Knowing that one is not, a reward or a, punishment, but it’s just the ebb and [00:14:00] flow of life, of business, of relationships, You can apply this to any area of your life. And I think you could see how those things all work together.
if you would like more information on how to go about fulfilling the roles and responsibilities, while nurturing your relationships and your wellbeing in a way that is very harmonious and not hustly, then you might want to join my weekly email series, harmony, not hustle.
You guys, thanks so much for being here.